I posted an update on social media last week; I’ve copied it below. Basically, I’m fairly sure I have multiple sclerosis, but I’ll have to wait until next year for a formal diagnosis. I’m posting things like this because if I’ve said publicly what’s happening to me, then it’s more difficult for me to pretend nothing’s wrong and do nothing about it.
There’s something I’ve been meaning to get off my chest for a while, and it is affecting my work and my dealings with friends, colleagues and family.
I haven’t been quite myself for the last couple of years. So I went to see a doctor. Had an MRI scan. And the conclusion is… nothing. At least, not yet.
I have an appointment to see a neurologist next year and I won’t get a diagnosis until then.
Which leaves me in an inconvenient limbo state.
Because I do know the MRI scan showed demyelination of my brain and spinal cord. Demyelination is the cause of multiple sclerosis, and the reason I was sent for an MRI scan is because I tick many of the boxes for multiple sclerosis symptoms. I have subsequently ticked several more.
There are other reasons why I might have demyelination and a multiple sclerosis diagnosis is a complex thing. So I might not have MS at all. However, having looked into this, MS seems the hot favourite for explaining why I haven’t been well.
I have over seven months to wait until I see the neurologist. I decided at the beginning of this week that seven months is too long a time to continue living my life in a way that’s no longer working for me.
So I’ve decided to make a working assumption that I do have MS and act accordingly. If the neurologist says differently, then I’ll react to what they say when we get there.
I finished a novel yesterday (Time Dogz #2), which makes now a perfect time to take a few days off to rethink and retool my days. I want to get the most out of what I can do rather than carry on in ways that no longer work.
And that does leave a great deal I can still do. I’m beginning to run again after a long enforced break. I’ve also written one and a half novels this year so far and work less in the evenings and weekends. But now I understand my situation more clearly, I can do better on all those things, do it in a less tiring way, and leave more time to relax with family, friends, and hobbies.
All I need is a rethink and to adapt my approach to a lot of things.
A few people have noticed I’ve been quiet or distant for patches of time, especially on social media. Now I begin to understand that the explanation is likely neurological. Some tasks I used to do without thinking can be exhausting sometimes, even though I enjoy them. At times, that includes chatting away on Facebook. It still doesn’t really make sense, but there you go. I’m sure I’ll work it out.
Anyway, that’s your lot. This is not an Otto Sump Sob Story because it’s just me requiring a little adjustment. I just wanted to keep everyone up to speed.